"I think I like someone, what should I do?"
Is that where everything begins?
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No, unfortunately.
I had that chain-message deleted as soon as I received it.
😢
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(just kidding! It's still in my inbox hehe)
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Ta-dah!! This is the box!
*look at the expiry date everybody!! >_<
Look at that daaaaate!
This coincidence isn't a novel chapter, babyyyy! |
• • • • •
Earlier this year, I noticed that he had deactivated his facebook, messenger too (forget instagram, he's long gone) and I was like "Mummyyyyy! Finally the time has come! He's gone forever, he's leaving me without saying anything!"
*who is he, you ask? I can't tell XD*
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| wuuuuuuuuuuuwuwuuu pity me T____T |
Buuuuuuuut it's okay, it's okay... *now sit down, woman* because I've never ever gone out there being crazy and frantically throwing :"HEYYY PEOPLE, I'VE MET SOMEONE THAT I'M GONNA MARRY! HE'S THE ONE~ ulala bebeh!" 🎉
Nope, so nobody knows. Pheww~
Self-pity dismissed 😌
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Then I saw his name on Messenger again. *sorry but no emoji can copy my smile here, I am just so happy!*
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I still hate Messenger though.
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Honestly, he's one of the reasons I'm still having that app in my phone. Other than that ummm.. oh there's none! *fake laughs* lol what a load of nonsense, I want to contact my friends also lah. But don't worry, one day when I finally decide that it is no longer useful to me, I will definitely give him this blog address...so he'll know that I'm still alive..hehe >_<
Ok what? If I didn't post anything in a year, you too can assume that I am dead.
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| That's right, you guys don't. T.T |
Actually, there is a possibility that he might've been here before but I'm just too chicken to admit that puahahaha. Remember when I stupidly put 'Dear you...' entry on facebook? And then when I more stupidly put this blog's address on instagram? Thrice 🙈.. I don't know where to hide my face if he really has been here (and never come back). But the possibilities are there...so...
Alright, maybe I should just ask him. Malu bertanya sesat jalan riteeee?! Wukay, but first we need to make a super short script and imagine his reply. Easy peasy :D
"...err...awak ada baca blog saya ke?"
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"Oh pleasssselah, I'm studying engineering! I've got enough struggle already, no time to read your blog ok~...now go away" *rolls eyes*
I'm expecting that 👆
So... I'm not gonna ask.
Phone number?
No. He's not my girlfriend. Enuff said.
Email then?
*ko ingat aku nak submit assignment? (¬_¬)/
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If I uninstall messenger, that will be like me trying to shut him out of my life - without saying goodbye.
It's not nice.
Plus I don't want to.
Not until he puts this to a stop.
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Guys~ of course I'm praying for the opposite, I hope there will be no stop to this. Ever.
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But then, what can I do?
This world doesn't revolve around me.
:)
Time changes people.
Meeting new person changes people too.
• • • • •
To tell you the truth, there are times when I feel like randomly sending him messages (just to tell him that I only have one cat now... or United just won a game hahahaha 😂 oh they won 4 nil today!!! *but I think he doesn't like MU..omg, is it Liverpool?! Is he The Reds?!). I want to do that sooooo so bad but always end up erasing everything over and over again. Plus, there's this stupid little voice from nowhere that keeps reminding me about him and I'm just like : Daymmm I miss him too.
Fyi,
it's really not fun missing someone you never know.
It's ridiculous.
Come to think about it Aliaa, what would you do anyway when you meet him one day? (urr..no idea *maybe I'll smile? like a retard*) And what are you going to say at him? (awak ni boleh cakap kelantan tak?) Or... what if you won't even get the chance to meet him? (now that's kind of disappointing, but I think it's fine).
PERGGHHH look at her being optimistic like that 😛
Ahahaha it's okay...really..
You know when I look at myself, I think I don't wanna meet him at all. Surprise! Hehe.. apart of me being a total weirdo, I guess he's totally out of my league. He's a genius, smart also aaaaaaand idk anymore.. .oh wait! I was like that too >_< only I screwed up last four yrs and then bad lucks kept trailing like ants. Seeeeriously can I just stay young forever so I won't have to think about something like this? 🙏
No?
Allah is the turner of the hearts, right? He owns our hearts and He can turn them whenever He wills. Whatever happens in the future, it must be best for both of us and we will be fine. Idk if that is easier said than done or whatnot... but I trust this guy and I pray for the best. I mean duuuude, we're not in any relationship. There's nothing keeping him from someone else, nothing except my prayers. That's the best thing for now, I guess.
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| Seung Chan is so me. |
And on a serious note, I have told my mum about you. Twice. Just let me know which version you wanna hear first. Both are interesting! Hehe ^^ there's nothing specific in our conversation tho. None! So don't fret :P She doesn't even know your name yet, or where you're studying, living, your hobby, and favorite color, food whatsoever (I don't know that either). What I told her was.. ehemm..
"Ma, I like someone.. do you see my face right now? This is my serious face ok. Do you know what it means? It means I'm serious, of course. He's only a year older though...buuuuut you must approve him anyway, oh in fact, you must approve anyone that I like wahahhaha! *evil grins* XP. And don't worry about distance, you won't have to board a flight to be at his hometown."
Yes, you guessed it right.
My lovely mother is afraid of the airplane. Cable car too.
She just smiled, like an angel! Tehee! ❤
It just feels wrong to keep this from my mum ok. She must know that I like someone (yes you) although I am not sure about the other party (youuuu). At least she doesn't have to waste her time arranging someone for me anymore...hooyay! Pfft. *coughs rainbow*
But the most important thing is I want her to know that this guy (also you), will never be able to break my heart. Because I won't allow that to happen, ever.
I can already see the disappointment on her face (abah too) if I let someone like that break my heart. Someone whom I've never met. I won't let both of you downnnnnnn, parents ❤
Besides, if I compare him to Ma and Abah who have taken care of me for over 22 years now (starting in the womb, bruh), he's absolutely nothing. Kejam siott~ but since he's not anywhere near halal to me so I guess it's fine!
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It's a shame that I can't deny this feeling in the first place.
Or is it not?
😉
oemmjiiii~ I really2 love leaving a lot of space like that!
Because it's annoying.
Mehehe kesian, you don't know him 😜
Don't worry, no one does.
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Looks like it will take me another year to be able to text you again.
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Anyway, happy 22nd birthday! Again.
May you be given the best in this life and the hereafter. Ameen.
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And I apologize also about last year. Terasa ehh?
How can I forget your birthday when the first wish is still in my inbox?
😆
No, actually it's something else lol. Kbyeee~
Just don't forget that it's always you.
